Further, to my last blog post's report on a leaked email from the homeopaths showing how they are trying to agree some wording with the ASA as to how they can advertise their services, I can now reveal the first draft. I think it is pretty good.
The homeopathic consultation will involve you visiting my front room where we will have a chat, a cup of tea and some Hobnobs. You will discuss your vague sense of unease, a headache you had last week when the kids were playing up, and how you are frightened of the chemicals they put in everything these days. At the end of the session, I will give you a little tub of sugar pills, and we can both pretend that these are a magic remedy for all of life's problems. As long as we don't get carried away and start acting as if they can cure real illnesses, then all will be dandy. I will then tell you to come back in a few weeks if life is still a bit shit.Oh, and you will give me £75, because I have a certificate and everything for this you know.